colin's intertube

The phrase "closers who flame out" sounds like a Wikipedia article that should redirect to the Milwaukee Brewers page, doesn't it? The Brewers have had a long and proud tradition of pulling closers out of nowhere. Closers who eventually go on to flame out, that is. Mike "Mustard Man" DeJean, Leo "Icelandic Brand" Estrella, Dan Kolb, Mike Adams, Derrick Turnbow, and coming soon - the Francophone Turnbow - Eric Gagne, have all fallen off the face of the Earth since being removed from the closer role.

Last night, I flipped on the AAA All-Star game just in time to see Nashville closer Luis Pena attempt close out the game for a Pacific Coast League victory. Unfortunately, he gave up 3 runs in the 9th and nearly gave up the lead. Pena is the logical choice to take over as the Brewers closer next season, so let's just hope he doesn't flame out before he arrives in Milwaukee.

Good business would be to let a guy close for a year, trade him, and let him flame out with the new club. We did that with Dan Kolb, and it netted us (the admittedly disappointing) Jose Capellan. Saloman Torres is having a solid year since being inserted in the closer role. We have an option for 2009, so we should pick that up and trade him in the offseason. Watch him flame out while Pena flourishes. Trade Pena, find another one-year wonder off the scrap heap for 2010, and so on.

God Bless America is Bud Selig's favorite song, therefore we have to endure it during Sunday Major League Baseball games. But...why do people feel the need to stand and put their hand over their heart? That's the national anthem that you do those things for. God Bless America is not the national anthem, it is a crappy generic patriotic song. Would you put your hand over your heart for "Proud To Be An American"? Or perhaps that stupid "America, Fuck Yeah!" song? Hmm, I think I will do just that, from now on.

Astros pitcher Shawn Chacon attacked General Manager Ed Wade, after Wade "was basically yelling and stuff".

Was he really yelling? Or just "basically" yelling? What does "basically yelling" mean, anyway? Chacon reminds me of the guy who bought my old cell phone on ebay, and later demanded a return because it "practically fell apart" when he took it out of the box. I allowed him to return the phone for a refund, and when it showed up, surprise surprise, it did not "practically" fall apart.

Shawn Chacon, you're a funny guy, and you have made my quotefile. Keep the exaggerations coming!

Last year, we had Jack Cust. This year, we have Russell Branyan. Who will be the next AAAA journeyman to put up All-Star numbers out of nowhere? The answer probably has more to do with opportunity than anything, but I stumbled across one guy who really looks the part. Brian Myrow is a 31-year-old first baseman (he can also play 3rd base and corner outfield) in the San Diego organization. He has only 30 career Major League at bats, but he has carried an OBP well over .400 over his AAA career, now spanning 4 seasons. He has some pop too, with a SLG over .500 in those seasons.

Certain AL teams are wasting hundreds of plate appearances on sub-.700 OPS designated hitters. There is no excuse for this when you have guys like Myrow waiting patiently in AAA. If San Diego isn't going to use this guy, someone can. A DH has one job, and that is to hit. Why, then, does Seattle continue to send Jose Vidro's .587 OPS out there every day? It would take a low-level prospect at best to land Myrow in a trade. Look at Branyan, he's been traded for cash, players to be named later (some of which were never even named!), and prospects with little-to-no hope of making it to the Majors. Come on, Mariners, all it would take is some A-ball relief pitcher, and a black hole in your lineup will be filled.

Now, about that Richie Sexson character...

With reports coming out that Seattle first baseman Richie Sexson will be released, and rumors swirling about Prince Fielder's future, an obvious solution appears to me.

You know where I'm going with this. Jeff Cirillo was a great Brewer in the late 90s. He had a few more good seasons in Colorado, then moved to Seattle and fell apart. A few years later, Cirillo comes back to Milwaukee. Career resurrected. Could the same happen to Richie Sexson? Maybe. The Brewers have a solid track record in recent years with reclamation projects. Cirillo, Doug Davis, Gabe Kapler, Jason Kendall, Brady Clark and Rick Helling were all players that everyone else had given up on. I don't know if its comfort. lower pressure, or just something in the water, but these types of players always seem to do well.

Prince Fielder is a great hitter, but he's also a Scott Boras client, and a likely DH candidate in the not-so-distant future. Since he's not likely to sign a Ryan Braun-like contract, and with the Brewers need for quality starting pitching (especially if they cannot re-sign Ben Sheets), trading Fielder to an AL team doesn't seem like such a bad idea. If Sexson can come anywhere near what he was doing two years ago, we lose very little production. If he continues to struggle...well, at least its an easy position to fill. I have little doubt that Mat Gamel or Matt LaPorta could handle first base at a Major League level. Russell Branyan, Joe Dillon, and countless AAAA power hitters are deserving of playing time.

Obviously, trading Fielder based on an assumption that Richie Sexson will return to his career averages is a bad idea. If we could pick up Sexson on a minor league deal, and make it clear to him that he'll be given the opportunity to start at first base if he performs well, this stupid proposition might just work out.